Hi, Loves.
If you follow SCC’s Instagram account @WhenTheSirenCalls, you know that July 21st was National Hand Job Day. To continue the celebration, I’ve decided to provide a quick n’ dirty rundown on hand job practices with helpful tips and resources:
- Make Sure You Have the Right Tools for the Job. I’m talking about your hands, of course. While some of this information may seem like common knowledge, it’s always good to mention, nonetheless.
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Make sure your hands are clean and smooth to the touch. Take care of any dry skin or scratchy calluses
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Clip your nails; if you’ve ever accidentally grazed a sensitive part of your body with an errant broken nail, you understand the discomfort this can cause. So to ensure your partner has an enjoyable experience, give them a trim and/or buff before you get down to business
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Lube up. Unless your partner prefers a dry handy, provide a smooth and frictionless hand job by using the lubrication of your choice (ex. water-based or silicone-based lube [watch your sheets as this kind may leave a stain], saliva, etc.)
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Take a Course in Anatomy 101. To be in the know about the penis and its parts, take the time to learn the basic anatomy of it:
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“The Head” – glans and frenulum (the most sensitive part of the penis)
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“The Body” – shaft and the foreskin (the least sensitive part of the penis, but important nonetheless!!)
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”The Base” – Scrotum, testicles and the perineum (the section between the scrotum and the anus). The scrotum can sometimes be forgotten when engaging in penile stimulation, but it is highly sensitive and, when manipulated correctly, incredibly pleasurable.
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”The Anus” – If your partner is open to anal play, you can incorporate anal play into your hand job for a heightened experience.
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By understanding the basic parts and levels of sensitivity, you can experiment with different techniques and methods of stimulation.
- Talk (Dirty) to Me. It’s important to communicate with your partner about what they like and how they like to be touched. Perhaps they have special go-to techniques that takes the over the edge, or areas of the penis that become extremely sensitive when aroused. This will allow you to adjust or modify your strokes to their liking. You can also talk sensually to them to increase the buildup of tension and the anticipation of what’s to come. Think of this sexy talk as a building block to a great hand job. It’s also a good idea to check in with your partner throughout the hand job to gauge their pleasure (if their moans aren’t telling you enough).
- Teamwork Makes the Cream Work. Now that you’ve stopped cringing at that terrible pun, this tip is a great way to ensure a pleasurable experience for the both of you. If you’re unsure about what they enjoy, ask your partner to demonstrate how they like to be pleasured. Not only do you get a hands-on example from the source (yes, there are more puns), but this will also show your partner that you’re really invested in learning about what they like and how to get them off.
- Work Your Way Up the Hand Job Ladder. Whether it’s your 1st or 1,000th hand job, begin with other acts of touch, kissing, and stroking before diving straight to the penis. Make it a fully sensual experience by engaging all of the senses (e.g., set the mood with a fragranced candle, kiss their neck, moan in their ear, etc.) Begin with a basic relaxed stroking technique, then gradually increase the intensity and variance of your stroke. YouTuber Vinny Therapy provides a PG-13 demo of how to give a hand job in this clip; however, if you’re looking for something more explicit with different techniques, check out this tutorial found on PornHub (NSFW, Loves.) In the meantime, here are some additional tips:
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- Don’t be afraid to use pressure and some intensity in your hand job. While you should handle the penis with care, remember that it isn’t a delicate flower
- Be intentional and present. Your partner wants to know that you are interested in what’s taking place and their pleasure. No one wants to feel like they’re partner would rather be somewhere else, so be in the here-and-now of your hand job.
Here are some additional resources on giving hand jobs:
- MasterClass with Emily Morse – Hand Job Tips: How to Give a Great Hand Job
- Lending a Helping Hand: How to Give the Perfect Hand Job
- Passionista: The Empowered Woman’s Guide to Pleasuring a Man – Ian Kerner, PhD. (While the writing is gendered in nature, but the information is still quite valuable)
